IN THIS ISSUE
ASK SMART BEGINNINGS
SOUTH HAMPTON ROADS
Dear SBSHR,
Our family is expecting a new bundle of joy this year, but
I’m worried about how my preschooler will react. How
can I help my daughter prepare for a sibling?
Dear Concerned Parent,
Congratulations to you and your growing family. The birth of a sibling is a major event in a young child’s life, especially if she was an only child up until this point. Although this is a very joyous event, your daughter’s daily routine is likely to be disturbed with feedings and crying, and it is inevitable that much of your time will be spent on the new baby once he or she arrives. It is important to let your child know what to expect when mom is in the hospital, such as who will be caring for her and when they’ll be able to see you and the new baby. She needs to know ahead of time that you’ll be very busy with the new baby, but that you will still make special one-on-one time to spend with her. Establishing a special time for the two of you (such as a bedtime story) will help maintain your bond and connection.
Experts agree that any major changes to your daughter’s routine (potty training, for example) should happen well in advance of the new baby’s arrival, or be postponed until things have settled down a bit. Try to be patient and understanding if your daughter has a difficult time adjusting to the new family member and give her appropriate ways to express her feelings. Be sure to let her “help” take care of the new baby if she is interested and interact with the baby in positive ways. Keep routines and rules as consistent as possible; children benefit from predictability in their lives, especially when there are major changes in the household.
Dear SBSHR,
I want to be more
involved as a father
with my children, but I
am often out of town
for long stretches of
time. What can I do
while I’m away from
home to stay involved
with my kids?
Dear Concerned Parent,
Thank goodness for technology. These days it’s easier than ever to keep in touch with your children and be a part of their daily lives, even when you’re not in the same city. Try some of these tips to stay connected with your kids.
- Be techno-savvy: Explore the possibility of using a web-cam to connect with your children while you’re away. This way, you can interact with them to stay up-to-date on their daily routines or just wish them sweet dreams at the end of the day. Of course, phone and email contact are great too.
- Have a routine: Buy two copies of a favorite story so you can read together at bedtime, either via web-cam or over the phone. If you can’t be available at your child’s bedtime, try videotaping or audio-recording yourself reading the story so that your child can watch or listen to it before bed.
- Maintain contact: One of the most obvious ways to stay involved is to keep the lines of communication open between you and the primary caregivers of your child, whether that’s your spouse, other relatives or the child’s teachers. Staying in touch with your child’s day-to-day routine (food preferences, napping schedules) will ease the transition when you return home.
- Make plans: By talking about what you’ll do together when you return from your trip, and then following through on those plans, you build the foundations of a trusting relationship with your children. Maybe you plan to go down the big slide at the park or work together to build a new doghouse.
Do you have a question for Smart Beginnings South Hampton Roads? Email your question to: info@smartbeginningsshr.org. Please include your name, phone number and email address with your question.
READY FOR SCHOOL
READY FOR LIFE